May 9, 2019 by Emilee
Sometimes I’m surrounded by all these grown up’s and think, “Wow, they are so wise. I hope when I grow up I have half their wisdom.” Then I get the harsh reality that I might be considered a grown up.
Is 37 a grown up???
I’ll have two teenagers next month. My oldest is taller than me. Making me feel even more like a child.
I struggle to feel qualified to share anything. The enemy has me right where he wants me. Scared, insecure and unqualified.
There’s this woman at my church who insists I use my God-given gifts!!! The nerve, right? She pushes me out of my comfort zone often and then tells me to knock it off when I’m filled with doubt. She sees something in me that I can’t see for myself. At times I’m convinced she’s crazy and other times I’m so grateful that God would put someone in my life who demands more out of me.
1 Timothy 4 says,
12 Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. 13 Till I come, give attention to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine. 14 Do not neglect the gift that is in you, which was given to you by prophecy with the laying on of the hands of the eldership. 15 Meditate on these things; give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all. 16 Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you.
Okay, so maybe I’m going way too far with this whole “youth” thing because lets face it, 37 is practically 40 and the aching back and wrinkled eyes paint a different picture. But these verses still pierce my heart. “Do not neglect the gift that is in you…” I so want to neglect my gifts. I want to hide where I’m safe from ridicule. I want to stay in the safety of feeling like I’m soooo young and have plenty of time to share my amazing insights and lessons. But God is asking me to “give myself entirely to them, that my progress may be evident to all.”
So scary, right? But there’s good news! I can be unqualified and still obey because Christ is qualified and His Spirit resides in me. hallelujah!
I pray you all have someone in your life, who you try to avoid, so they won’t ask you out of your comfort zone.
God has great use for you and I am thankful for that.